my new book

So people keep telling me (based on my facebook statuses no less) that I should write a book.  I guess you could say my life is quite hectic. Mum of four at the tender age of 21. ok 25...Oh ok ok, 30, but that's still young! Just because I feel 100, and my fashion item of choice these days is fleece pyjamas from primark (it's not laziness, I'm making a statement) does not mean that I actually have to acknowledge the fact that i'm what you could describe as past it. Over the hill. Mutton not even dressed as lamb. I won't go on.

But I digress.  Today is the day I decided to write it all down. It won't all be funny or witty, there may well be extra letters in words. And spelling mistakes. This is because i'll be typing one handed and one eyed. The other hand will be cradling my 9 week old nursling, who is 8 weeks old and of the opinion that a moment off the boob is a moment wasted. The other eye will be upon the other children, (not the 9 year old; he'll be happily ensconced in his room, reading lord of the rings, or quantum physics, or drawing up his plans for total world domination) who at 6 (and autistic) and amost 3, can acheive mass destruction in a matter of seconds.  And when i say destruction, I mean a snowstorm of sugar in the kitchen, or every soft toy they own taking a lovely bubble bath. If you're a mum you know the drill. If you're not....well please don't let me put you off! Continue to tell yourself the same thing not-yet-parents have told themselves for millenia "My children won't be like that!!"

So today is Mothers day, my 1st one as a mum of 4. Baby was due yesterday, however my body had other ideas and after the onset of pre-eclampsia at 31 weeks, the poor boy was plucked unceremoniously from my body. So i'm the proud owner of a 6lbs almost 9 week old. feel free to say "aawwwww!" as it makes us both feel better!  For mothers day, among some lovely handmade and shop bought presents of varying degrees of glitteriness (when you're a 2 year old girl, there is NO SUCH THING as too much glitter during craft projects), was a book. A cookbook. Baking to be exact. I've always been a keen cake baker. Sadly my enthusiasm doesnt quite make up for the fact that i'm rubbish at it. I follow the instructions to the letter, and all the while my creation is in the oven, I have visions of beautiful light sponge, a work of art, a cake i'd be proud to show off on facebook. The end result is usually a flat, burnt, sticky mess. I rant and rave, I blame the oven, and the lack of kitchen space (I kid you not, i have 4 cupboards. 4. to fit everything in for a family of 6) I've been known to sit on the floor and cry at my rotten luck. None of this puts me off doing it all over again!  So I was pleased to receive this new book, entitled "Bake yourself happy." This struck a chord with me, and on reading further I discover that this is a book, not by an expert like Delia, but by a woman who bakes to alleviate her depression. Her introduction is honest and to the point, some days its a toss up between killing herself or making cupcakes. Thankfully, the cupcakes always win. Having suffered from depression on and off since my teens, I honestly know where she is coming from. For me, my kids always keep me going, but however rewarding it is in the long run, at times being a mother, especially to a child with additional needs, can be a thankless task, and sometimes my life feels like the film groundhog day, nothing changes (other than the growing mess) and i just want to lock myself in the bathroom and cry. So could this new book help in my quest for eternal contentment? And can this kindred spirit teach me more than the hundreds of other cookbook authors before her? We're about to find out!

I pledge to bake every item in the book. It may take months, but I am going to do it! And I will share my experiences (and even the end result, if you're brave and live near enough)

I will also share some of the aspects of the other areas of my life, just so you can laugh, cry, and judge at your leisure...